Friday, August 12, 2005

Is Our Children Evolving?

The simmering fires of Tennessee vs. John Scopes of 1925 were rekindled in a press conference last week when Mr. "No Child Left Behind" suggested that the "theory" of Intelligent Design should be included in the public school science classroom as a "competing theory" to evolution. This is a thinly disguised effort to further erode the separation of church and state. But I don't think the level of decay between the separation of state and church has been explored completely enough...

Therefore I propose that Evolution be included in church sermons as a competing "orthodoxy" to Creationism. Every Bible should be required to display a sticker that reads: "Creationism is only a myth, not a theory." Just think of all the children who may be graduating from their Sunday School curriculum without having The Origin of the Species to "balance" out the Book of Genesis. These impressionable minds taking in the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John without the secular counterbalance of Darwin, Dawkins, Gould and Dennett. Years of seminary courses focused on Noah's Ark filled with two of every animal without making any mention of the rich diversity of species found on the Galapagos Islands. Such teaching could churn out generations untroubled by "evidence" (or lack thereof) or "peer review." Such unbalance conjures up classrooms filled with students sitting crookedly at their desks as all their left buttocks have been amputated as part of the "No Child Left Behind" requirement. We simply cannot let these unaccountable, tax-exempt churches corrupt our precious youth any longer with such one-sided, faith-based indoctrination any longer.

Update: Perhaps we should take this particular fight to Kansas first. Clearly they're in the most danger of abandoning the values that come from a good, old fashioned secular education.